Unpacking Europe

I brought my journal with me to Europe and didn't write a word.  Now that I'm back home and have had some rest, I think I'm ready to write about the experience.

I don't think I can make this linear.  The memories are coming at me in flashes.  I remember that before we went to the North Sea, Lisa, Andrea's wife, bought a Russian newspaper.  One of the articles was about the man in the Northwest United States who had a baby.  Lisa spend a long time reading this article, asking if it could be true.  I explained in German that the man still had female body parts and then told them that this couple was on Oprah.  Believe or not, Oprah has not invaded Germany.  They had never heard of her. Jeff and I think that Lisa would love to have a child.

One night Andreas told me more of his story.  When he told his family doctor about his realization that his soul was male.  The doctor said, 'Ja, then you must go to Hamburg'.  He went to the university and began to take hormones, culminating in surgery to become male.  I don't know what type of surgery he had exactly.  I can't see any evidence of scars on his arms or legs where flesh was taken to fashion a penis.  Maybe, the surgery was to remove his breasts and, maybe, he also had a hysterectomy.   I hope he has had his female parts removed since I worry that the hormones he must take could cause cancer, like the man from the documentary, Southern Comfort.

I love my brother so much.  We connect on a deep level and we don't have all the painful history that I have with my other siblings. I don't know if it's because we've both undergone a journey of self discovery.  I can truly talk to him, though I hesitate to ask him certain questions.  I'm afraid that my German will fail me and I will offend him.  

One question I did ask him was why he chose the name, Andreas.   He answered that it came to him from his soul.  It just seemed to fit.  

He showed me a photo album with photos that documented his transition.  In some photos, he has feminine features and is androgynous.  And then suddenly all feminine features disappear and it is hard to believe that he was born female.  I didn't realize that he was married once before but there are a number of photos from the day he married his first wife.  He told me that she had a drinking problem and slept with other people, both male and female, and then lied about it.  It was while he was with this woman that he made the transition.  A couple of years ago, she called to ask forgiveness from Andreas as she was dying of cancer.